I have been in Atlanta, Georgia- and back now – after donning my organizing hat apron as I assisted an octogenarian in her relocation to Wisconsin. That nearly 90 year-old woman happens to be my mother.
My mission:
- sort, pack and move the contents of a 3 bedroom ranch home [including attic, double garage and shed] where my Mother has lived for the last 17 years,
- engage a realtor in listing and selling that home [in an extremely depressed housing market],
- support Mom as she says goodbye to her friends, family and church,
- get her to 2 doctor appointments,
- then accompany her to the airport and get her on her way to Wisconsin to enjoy her new life and home.
I am happy to report I have been successful in my mission [yes, I even got the house sold].
Here’s how all this unfolded.
Background:
This last summer, while visiting family in Wisconsin, Mom’s frail bones- unknown to us- gave way to a fracture in one of Mom’s lower vertebrae. We knew Mom had osteoporosis. We didn’t know she had a fractured vertebra until the 4th trip to the emergency room when Mom’s pain was so intense; it required admittance to the hospital, a vertebroplasty procedure and a 3 week subsequent stint in a physical rehabilitation center. It was during that recovery time it was decided Mom would should be living closer to family, in Wisconsin. And thus a relocation plan began to be hatched.
I have relocated myself from Beijing to Massachusetts and have professionally assisted clients with local moves, organizing and home staging. Whether international or within the same city- a move, is a upheaval requiring attention to every last little detail. Fortunately for my Mother’s move I had some time (and family support) to strategize her relocation.
Moving Tip #1: Have a plan, work the plan and be willing to change the plan as needed.
A couple weeks prior to actually being at her home in Atlanta I organized a logistical spreadsheet including all tasks needed in relocating Mom back north including: sorting, packing and moving, selling Mom’s house and getting some medical care for Mom during her last days in Atlanta. The spreadsheets became more robust as it bounced back and forth in emails between my brother and sister.
Day 1: Saturday
I coordinated Mom’s and my arrival flights, into Atlanta, so we could share transport from the airport to her home. After opening her house things were relatively calm considering Mom’s unplanned extended 4 month summer vacation surgery & rehabilitation. Her houseplants didn’t fare as well. I cleared the fridge of science experiments, double checked for insect invaders, and got a few groceries being careful to coordinate just enough food to feed us as we disassembled the kitchen.
Moving Tip #2: Keep like items together.
My nephew arrived that evening as he was going to stay for a couple of days to sort through some items he had stored at Grandma’s house. I was happy to have his height around and that evening we set-up unmoving headquarters at the kitchen table. Limited time requires pin-point scheduling of tasks, grouping of similar types of tasks occurring in the same general area and the ability to visually analyze the project’s overall status at all times. Plus, this has to be done in an environment that is constantly shrinking.
Day 2: Sunday
I accompanied Mom to church. She had some dear friends to say goodbye to and it was an emotional day for all. We picked up some basic packing supplies on our way home and arrived back at the house to find my nephew (with my niece)-belongings slung across the backyard- sorting their stuff keeping the gems and tossing the rest. After lunch I crawled up into the attic and began lowering dusty boxes from the attic to my nephew and a friend of my niece. The once empty garage floor filled quickly. Boxes were assessed and divided into areas: Keep, Donate and Toss.
Moving Tip #3: When moving there are only 3 choices:
Keep, Donate and Toss!
Day 3: Monday
The dumpster arrived first, followed by the movers- there to estimate the packing and finally the two realtors I had coordinated the weeks prior to arriving in Atlanta. In between appointments I had Mom examining attic boxes so she could determine the fate of the contents inside each box. I was also able to get Mom’s car emissions updated and get to the courthouse to renew the license plate tags. The plan was to pack the car with Mom’s valuables and have my brother fly down and drive the car to Wisconsin.
I hand packed large, antique, framed photographs of family while Mom dusted the smaller ones and I tucked them into the “Car Boxes” as they became known. Other jewelry, hand-stitched-antique quilts, clocks and even my father and sister’s ashes were carefully packed for the limited space Mom’s tiny compact KIA compact would hold.
My Mother has always been an excellent housekeeper and meticulous in her paperwork. It’s from her I learned many of my organizing skills. However, each evening we had a ritual of sorting and shredding papers my mother had accumulated in her office/sewing room.
Moving Tip #4: Keep all important papers together.
Moving time is not the time to establish a new routine. Save new filing systems until AFTER the move and you will better remember the whereabouts of your important papers
Day 4: Tuesday
I woke very early in the morning, pulled items out of the garage for donation to the American Kidney Foundation [they do pickups]. After breakfast, Mom had decided upon a realtor, a price for the house and I called back to discuss further details of the house marketing and sale procedures. We dropped my nephew off at the airport and I then took Mom for blood work at her doctor’s office. From there, we did some banking tasks, followed by a trip to the jeweler to pick up a ring that had been in for repairs. We also had to call Mom’s funeral home to discuss transferring her funeral package to Wisconsin.
We then finished up sorting the items from the attic which were sitting on the garage floor we moved into the office for more sorting and purging. We spent the evening watching a few television shows as we hand-shredded old papers and documents. Each day was non-stop and my Mother held up doing as much as she physically could. Because we had both gotten up so early in the morning, this was the only day we scheduled in a nap.
Day 5: Wednesday
Early morning was more sorting and purging of any items in the house that were not going to be moving on to Wisconsin. I packed a small box to send to myself and while at the Post Office mom picked up her change of address package. I can tell you I’ve worked with the post office down here, getting vacation mail sent up to Wisconsin, during mom’s recovery. I’ve changed her address temporarily and mail still kept appearing in her front yard mailbox. Go figure. Nonetheless we completed the paperwork again.
Moving Tip #5: Be comfortable with your realtor.
Interview a couple of realtors, if you need to, so you are working with someone who compliments your personality. Also, keep copies of everything and have a lawyer check your paperwork.
The realtor dropped off disclosure paperwork for Mom and I to complete. Five pages of questions pertaining to the house and we did this in between our final purging and sorting activities. The packers were coming the next day and I knew they were going to work fast and furiously.
Day 6: Thursday
The 4 packers arrived about 10:30am and started into their work. I popped from room to room directing the packers, while mom did what she could to answer questions: “What was staying?” and “What was going?”. By 5:30 the contents had been packed into 93 boxes. Furniture, lamps and other items the movers would wrap and pack laid about the house like tired soldiers.
Moving Tip #6: When engaging professional packers & movers be sure you are as ready as possible for their arrival.
Professionals work quickly and you do not want to be left making decisions at this last minute.
A former neighbor and friend of my Mother’s stopped by to pick up a few items and my niece came by again and got other things promised to her. That evening the house was quiet and we were exhausted. Mom and I decided to go to a hotel.
Day 7: Friday
We drove back to the house and the large Mayflower moving van arrived shortly there after. Three movers worked quickly and boxes flew out of the house. Mom supervised as I double checked the shed for any final items. My niece came by to take my Mother to her final doctor’s appointment. I signed the moving papers and watched the semi truck pull out with well over 200 pieces of my Mother’s belongings. I know she packed too much, but she’ll have time in Wisconsin to unwrap and rediscover all her possessions.
Mom will be scaling-back to a small apartment and my extended family, in Wisconsin, will be able to communally use many of Mom’s household items; leaf blowers and power washers etc. which will be centrally stored at my sister’s [or brothers] home. I also arranged for Mom’s cable and land-line to be installed in her new Wisconsin apartment and scheduled the delivery of her new dining table [also purchased in Wisconsin].
Moving Tip #7: Know where everything is going to go.
While Mom might have over packed, we knew this and planned for large items to be stored with extended family. Additionally, we worked with Mom’s new apartment floor plan as we decided what-would-go-where, when she gets to her new home.
I handled one last unexpected car repair, mailed myself another small package and picked up SubWay sandwiches for lunch. Mom’s cleaning lady came back for one last swoop through the house and took the items from Mom’s fridge and freezer along with a few miscellaneous items left in the empty house.
Our former neighbor stopped by to get more items and brought along his sister-in-law. As it turned out she was interested in purchasing Mom’s house and made a verbal offer. We headed to the airport to pick up my brother and shared the news of a potential offer to buy.
Day 8: Saturday
Coming back to the empty house we had our traditional southern breakfast I handled a few computer transactions as we waited for the realtor to come by with final papers. [As it turned out, this step was for not, we were able to sell the house and property to Mom’s old neighbor’s family.] Those folks came by the house, with a written offer and earnest monies for Mom.
My cousin and her husband drove from North Carolina to pick up our old dining table and some miscellaneous items and we had our first sit down full lunch at the local Ruby Tuesday’s. Mom and I had been grabbing food on the fly all week and it was nice to sit down and enjoy the company.
Moving Tip #8: Network when selling property
Old neighbors, friends, colleagues, and family might be interested in the property you are selling.
After lunch our guest drove off in their loaded van and we went onto the airport to pick up a rental car which would serve us in our last days in Atlanta. My niece stopped by for her last goodbyes. My brother and I packed Mom’s car with all the fragile important items and we headed back to the hotel-exhausted again.
Day 9: Sunday
My brother rose at 5am to drive off in the dark and Mom and I went back to sleep. We enjoyed a leisurely Sunday morning watching the news a lounging in bed, then had breakfast, stopped by the house for final pictures, and decided to go watch a movie. This was the first overcast day, so we didn’t have to feel bad missing out on the specular sunny weather we had all week.
Moving Tip #9: Send out change of address notes
Everyone will want your new contact information
After the movie Mom’s old neighbor [the new house owners] met us at the house to say goodbye. Then we locked up the house for the last time and headed to our hotel room. My brother called to let us know he had safely returned to Wisconsin.
Day 10: Monday
We had another semi-leisurely morning and had a “lighter” version of the southern breakfast at Pop’s Place. On our way to the airport we picked up keys and papers from our realtor, said goodbye to mom’s hairdresser and headed to the airport. I dropped Mom off at the Delta Dash, checked us both in and got her situated with a wheelchair, while I swung back around the airport to drop off the rental car.
Mom was using a wheelchair, as that much walking would have been too much walking. The wheelchair did help expedite matters getting through airport security however, I forgot to remove my metal-encased lip balm and ended up getting the Atlanta-pat-down complete with a tiny security wipe over my hands.
We split a quick sandwich with sweet tea and then treated ourselves to a slice of Paschal’s pecan pie.
Maneuvering a wheelchair at the Atlanta airport is fairly easy, it really gives another “view” of what handicapped people have to deal with when traveling. I had allowed extra time to use facilities and after a last minute gate change got Mom to her gate . We said our goodbyes and I watched as they wheeled her on board. I headed to my gate and homeward.
As it turned out both our planes were delayed out of ATL. Mom’s suitcases were not at the MKE airport. However, they appeared on my sister’s doorstep were sometime in the night.
Moving Tip #10: Plan early for a move
While we did this in 10 days, I do not recommend trying this at home. Moving is a physically and emotionally exhausting experience. Whenever possible allow as much time as you can to make a move. The more time you have the more money you will save on moving.
Bonus Moving Tip: Use and love what you have.
Why not use Grandma’s fine silver nightly on the dinner table? What better way to honor the past in the present!